Innermost Thought

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August 15, 2002

Not a Tourist spot

Not a Tourist spot
One of the less pleasant things we did was visit the WTC site. I really, really wish we hadn't done that. It was shocking. Even more so than when I went in November. So much empty space where things I remember used to be. I felt a little resentful that these people were just there to gawk. To marvel. The top tourist attraction of 2002.
"There. I touched it. Now I can tell my friends at the water cooler. Let me get one more picture." Part of me understands that people need to see this and experience its reality. I know its important these strangers understand. I just worry that people are less about understanding and more about collecting the next souvenir experience. Elitist of me? Perhaps, but that's the way I feel.

I am dreading September 11, 2002. I am not ready to put this whole thing in a box and package it to the masses. The mourning isn't really over for me. I'm still not ready to process the event much less its anniversary. I have a friend who was there that day, fled for his life and all that. Just recently we were looking at the Traveler's Building. After I professed a desire to live there, he sort of laughed at me and said it was an office building and then casually said, "That's where I was when the first tower went down." I wonder how much of the changes in his life this last year stem from 8:48 that fateful Tuesday. With the impending anniversary, I worry that I don't know the words to say that will comfort this person. Just like a stereotypical man, I tend to be intensely frustrated at not being able to make it all better. Listening just doesn't seem to be enough. I suppose I will cross that bridge when it comes to me.

Posted by mermu at August 15, 2002 02:35 PM

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