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June 18, 2004
Love (or the lack thereof) in Letters
I've learned alot this week about the whys and wherefores of sending all my love (or the lack thereof) in a letter.
This week I wrote a card to my dad for Father's day. It was a really cool card and I think I managed to say something in a way that fit with the card while expressing my gratitude, love, and respect for being my father. I hope he likes it as much as I do.
I also had a miscommunication in an e-conversation with my dashing Englishman. What I thought he was saying he wasn't really saying and my response was well written, specific, honest and a little shocking to said Englishman. We managed to work it out and I found a new respect for the dangers and shenanigans of text and e-messaging.
Finally, I had to writer a letter to my ex. Deon was never the sort of man who understood honor and respect unless he wanted something very specific. It took a few months for me to understand that. He would only do the Considerate trick if you waived a treat in his face. When there was no treat, consideration and respect were concepts no more than foreign words said without the proper inflection. Anyway, I had to advise him of an act he had been committing against me I found inappropriate and inconsiderate in the hopes that in educating him of the inappropriateness he would abstain from the behavior.
In writing these three letters/emails I have come to understand that I really like writing...taking the time to express myself. It's cathartic and energizing and I hate that I wait until I just can't take it anymore before I speak or write my mind. Searching for the right word on paper or email insures that I will be just as clear about what I want and need to myself as to the person I am writing.
I've also realized that my pen, any pen adequate and precise, is incredibly powerful. I can lift someone up or push them into a drowning world of discomfort. My pen is powerful even when...perhaps especially when poisoned. That's a great gift. And like many gifts; it comes with a certain amount of responsibility.
Posted by mermu at June 18, 2004 10:34 AM
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