Innermost Thought

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June 22, 2005

Her Name is Sheeba Ma'am

Another crucial difference between Texas and New York City lies in the way we address each other with formal or informal titles. A person is much more likely to address a stranger with the respected title of "sir" or "ma'am" in the South. Up North, some women are mightily offended at being referred to as ma'am. Hard to believe something so genteel could be so insulting but I've seen it happen. Though, I've always known that "sir" or "ma'am" is proper, I believe that I solidified my belief in using these polite titles when I'd lived in the North. With so many people (including myself) whose first reaction at being spoken to a stranger is wariness, using "sir" or "ma'am" here and there seems to do a little to dispel such wariness. What a great opportunity to show respect for all people; bus driver, waitress, millionaire entreprenuer. It's a small thing that displays belief that all people have worth no matter what they are "worth".

I find that I use the titles without even thinking these days. When I'm walking my dog, I frequently call her "ma'am" when I'm telling her no. On one such occasion when Sheeba was attempting to go in the street without permission, I cautioned her, "No, ma'am. Don't you go in that street." A friendly and inquisitive passer-by stopped to ask about her and perhaps pet her a little. When talking to her, he assumed her name was Ma'am and proceeded to coo at her. "Good Ma'am. Hello Ma'am" etc.

I'm almost positive that a person in the South would know that wasn't her name. I didn't have the energy to correct him as I was sure it would confuse him and who wants a stranger to know your dog's name anyway. It is bemusing though.

Posted by mermu at June 22, 2005 03:44 PM

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